Nobody gets out alive

December 13, 2006 at 10:00 am 2 comments

In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

Life is sexually transmitted.

Take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate of dying.

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and he won’t bother you for weeks.

If you feel blue, start breathing again.

Some people are like Slinkies: not really good for anything, but you can’t help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Politics is the second oldest profession. It bears a very close resemblance to the first.

Never take life too seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

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Entry filed under: humor, quotations.

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2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. fracas  |  December 13, 2006 at 4:29 pm

    #’s 1, 5, 8 and 9. My favorites. 🙂

    Reply
  • 2. Mark  |  April 18, 2007 at 1:37 am

    Thank You

    Reply

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