Tequila Christmas Cookies

December 3, 2006 at 11:45 am 1 comment

Just in time for the holidays!

1 cup water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup lemon juice
4 eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups dried fruit
1 bottle Tequila

Sample the Tequila to check quality.
Take a large bowl, check the Tequila again, to be sure it is of the highest quality.
Pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer.
Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.
At this point it’s best to make sure the Tequila is still okay – try another cup…just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.
Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit, pick the frigging fruit off floor, mix on the turner.
If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the Tequila to check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift two cups of salt…or something.
Who giveshz a sheet.

Check the Tequila. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.
Greash the oven.
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
Don’t forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Tequila and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.



Entry filed under: holidays, humor.

Uh oh. My Pirate Name

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. travelingmedicineshow  |  December 3, 2006 at 12:51 pm

    I can’t believe you got me. I often find things very funny but still don’t laugh out loud. I just read “Tequila Christmas Cookies” out loud to Hatbox Louie and my delivery was interrupted by frequent chortles, guffaws, titters, and other synonyms presented to make myself seem smart. But, truly a great post. I will send it along. Dr. Nostrum
    (P.S. I apologize for any typos, but I just got into the jagerbiscuits).


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

Trackback this post  |  Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed

Iced Mocha

Celebrating life, knowledge, laughter, inspiration, and goodwill.


Top Posts



Flickr -Kittens

RSS Saved in Ma.gnolia

  • An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.


December 2006
« Nov   Jan »

%d bloggers like this: